Penalty Magazine

The New Normal: Football and (Shop Bought) Pies

Since the onset of the pandemic, and the various lockdowns that have ensued, life and the way we spend our free-time has radically altered. Gone is my routine of waking up on a Saturday, heading up to the Kings Road with my Dad and Brothers, and slotting into our seats at the Bridge. Half-time would come, and so begins the rush to the bar and the clamour that comes with footballs elite goal-scoring duo: a pint and a pie.

However, the life I used to take for granted is gone. I came close to attending Chelsea Vs West Ham in December, after winning tickets in the ballot, but we know how that turned out (Cheers, Boris). Since, a persistent and persuasive nostalgia has lead me down a path that could only be described as inevitable: getting tanked up and reviewing a load of shop bought pies whilst watching the Chels’. With Pies at the bridge costing £4.50, the challenge was to find the best personal sized pie about, below this price, available in the local shops.

Without further ado, the conquest of pie number 1: Steak and Ale Shortcrust Pastry Pie from Marks and Spencer’s, valued at £2.10.

I must admit, I had high hopes for this number - being the most up-market of all the ones we had selected – and I was not let down. As shop bought pies go, it was a strong start. The crust was flaky, the filling tasty and the density hefty. However, for fairness of the review considering it was the most expensive singular pie on the list, I’d give a healthy 4/5.

Up next pie number 2: Sainsbury’s Specials Steak and Ale Pies (x2), valued at £2.50.

Having been tricked into this one, seeing it’s coined “pub specials”, the pie sadly left a rather flat feeling. More than anything else, puff pastry pies really do not hit the same note as their shortcrust cousins. Probably too much and not that viscous a gravy, but the steak tasted nice. With two pies included, this is a fairly safe bet, scoring a steady 3/5.

Trying to push the limits of edible pies moves us on to pie number 3: Iceland’s Steak and Kidney Pie, valued at £0.65.

Simply, this effort was all over the shop; focally committing the cardinal sin of over salting and having a sour after taste I could only imagine resembles a decaying rat. Overall, a very unpleasant experience. But seeing the pittances it actually costs in comparison to the Chelsea pie, Iceland’s effort gains a measly 1/5.

After the previous disappointment, I was hoping for better with number 4: Tesco’s shortcrust steak pie, coming in at £1.25 (g’warn the 25p clubcard savings).

The New Normal: Football and (Shop Bought) Pies

Since the onset of the pandemic, and the various lockdowns that have ensued, life and the way we spend our free-time has radically altered. Gone is my routine of waking up on a Saturday, heading up to the Kings Road with my Dad and Brothers, and slotting into our seats at the Bridge. Half-time would come, and so begins the rush to the bar and the clamour that comes with footballs elite goal-scoring duo: a pint and a pie.

However, the life I used to take for granted is gone. I came close to attending Chelsea Vs West Ham in December, after winning tickets in the ballot, but we know how that turned out (Cheers, Boris). Since, a persistent and persuasive nostalgia has lead me down a path that could only be described as inevitable: getting tanked up and reviewing a load of shop bought pies whilst watching the Chels’. With Pies at the bridge costing £4.50, the challenge was to find the best personal sized pie about, below this price, available in the local shops.

Without further ado, the conquest of pie number 1: Steak and Ale Shortcrust Pastry Pie from Marks and Spencer’s, valued at £2.10.

I must admit, I had high hopes for this number - being the most up-market of all the ones we had selected – and I was not let down. As shop bought pies go, it was a strong start. The crust was flaky, the filling tasty and the density hefty. However, for fairness of the review considering it was the most expensive singular pie on the list, I’d give a healthy 4/5.

Up next pie number 2: Sainsbury’s Specials Steak and Ale Pies (x2), valued at £2.50.

Having been tricked into this one, seeing it’s coined “pub specials”, the pie sadly left a rather flat feeling. More than anything else, puff pastry pies really do not hit the same note as their shortcrust cousins. Probably too much and not that viscous a gravy, but the steak tasted nice. With two pies included, this is a fairly safe bet, scoring a steady 3/5.

Trying to push the limits of edible pies moves us on to pie number 3: Iceland’s Steak and Kidney Pie, valued at £0.65.

Simply, this effort was all over the shop; focally committing the cardinal sin of over salting and having a sour after taste I could only imagine resembles a decaying rat. Overall, a very unpleasant experience. But seeing the pittances it actually costs in comparison to the Chelsea pie, Iceland’s effort gains a measly 1/5.

After the previous disappointment, I was hoping for better with number 4: Tesco’s shortcrust steak pie, coming in at £1.25 (g’warn the 25p clubcard savings).

Go Back

Using Format